our gender reveal | boy or girl

“and she loved a baby boy so much- even more than she loved herself.”

// the giving tree

in june, we are going to welcome another sweet boy, a baby brother for parks 

-another darling boy-

my momma heart might explode

this past sunday was the day we spent as a family; we spent the whole day together. it was the 30th anniversary of my gentle/beautiful grandma passing away; a special day in so many ways. 

we took the morning slow; we made pancakes + coffee and then went to church together. the service was lovely and sentimental and i think it was meant for us and our day ahead. i had so many tears streaming down my face throughout- my heart was already so full as we left that loving space. from there, we went to a local park in one of our favorite neighborhoods of charlotte. (where we also had our engagement photos taken) it was lightly raining, just the three (four) of us. we took the ultrasound envelope (he is adorable already!), two sets of bouquets, and an umbrella and went to a shelter house. my husband mentioned later on in the day that he was actually glad that it was raining- and i agree. for some reason, it made it even more special. parks had a blast running around with his new boots and big umbrella. 

‘it’s a boy!’

it was him. it was always him.

-the moment i knew, i felt a sense of peacefulness-

that bond i had when i was carrying parks was suddenly present again

for each of our children, i honestly will never care one way or the other about the gender … but this time, a little boy was secretly in the back of my mind. i had a sister two years younger than me and my husband had a brother two years younger. two of our first and forever best friends throughout this one life. if someday we do have a baby girl, i will be just as overjoyed. when i first found out that parks was a boy, the thought of bonding/being connected did cross my mind … but then God taught me more than i ever could have known. (i wrote about this here, thoughts on being a boy mom) i quickly discovered that a little boy was just what i was meant to have and i have thanked Him every day since for bringing parks into my life, for choosing him to be mine, my sweet-souled son. our bond is the single greatest thing i have ever experienced. motherhood has changed me in so many ways- it has made me stronger, more compassionate, calmer- my priorities in life have changed. i choose my friendships more carefully, i yearn for simple more, my life is more faith centered- i have been chasing slow. and i love being a boy mom. i think God knew that just one wasn’t enough for me.

for some reason, i have a hard time determining the number of children for our family right now- prior to experiencing life. … it’s just impossible for me to put a price tag on a life (and my husband actually said this sunday as we bonded about our news over guacamole and talked about his possible name / our excitement.) i had never brought this up to him but had always thought about it. there is no doubt that kids are extremely, extremely expensive – yet there is more to it for me. it’s just that people have asked me this question a lot lately and i simply don’t have an answer.  and i honestly can’t imagine having an answer for this right now. we both hope to have three children but plan to play it all one baby, one blessing, at a time… maybe there will be two- maybe there will be three, four, or more?! neither one of us are able to decide this prior, at this moment, but we plan to pray every day and soak it all in- each step of the way. in my heart, i know the holy spirit will whisper to us when our family is officially complete. i also have a childhood dream that might play a role in all of this- but only time will tell. 

if i am blessed with a house full of boys

i hope they take good care of their momma 

knowing what is happening is almost as beautiful as knowing where it is all leading

yesterday morning i woke up- still on cloud nine- and began to go through many of parks’ old baby clothes. he helped me (parks loves to “help” me clean, do laundry, cook, etc.) he enjoyed attempting to put on some of the tiny clothes. i decided to make a pile to sell/donate and then we went to my favorite local consignment shop and picked out a few new (and super cute) pieces for his baby brother, our summer baby boy. and then we got donuts.

-outfit details-

parks’ sweater / jeans: gap . leather suspenders: etsy . rain boots: hunter

my top: anthropologie . shoes: free people . maternity jeans: target

and then he was off to celebrate… so many adventures ahead for this big boy

after the park, we went to a local taco spot and enjoyed some guacamole + tacos + beers for my husband  (ah, the beers looked so good, so refreshing!)

more bow ties + suspenders + powder blue are coming our way 

 i love this song 

and this one

saturday night, as i was rocking parks before bed, i started to cry

-yes, so many tears lately-

just four months left together

just him and i.

i am planning on enjoying them all

and am thankful for every single adventure so far.

b-o-y

forever my first boy, my love

still my baby

-always my baby-

i hope you love having a little brother

just like your mom adored (and still cherishes) her little sister

xo